The Birds Who Chose Our Home

 https://youtu.be/cAmqrZpBCXk

The Birds Who Chose Our Home

It was May 10, 2026—Mother's Day.

It had been exactly five years since we lost our paternal grandparents. Our hearts were still heavy from the recent loss of our maternal grandfather. Our mom and Ammamma had just landed in Portland the day before, after emptying their home in Hyderabad and closing a chapter of their lives.

That morning, we noticed two birds inspecting our front porch, digging around in our small white planter. They had done the same thing last year, so we knew what was coming.

Sure enough, over the next week, a beautifully crafted nest appeared. Then, one by one, four tiny eggs arrived over four days. Soon after, the mama bird settled onto them, patiently keeping them warm.

Every morning, we'd quietly crack open the front door just enough to see if she was still there.

One day, all four eggs had hatched. Tiny, fragile baby birds filled the nest. They were almost featherless, with only the faintest lines where their eyes would eventually open. We watched the mama and papa birds tirelessly take turns feeding them, protecting them, and keeping watch over our porch.

We stopped using our front door so we wouldn't disturb their little family.

Day by day, the transformation was remarkable. Wisps of down became feathers. Their eyes slowly opened. They grew stronger and began making tiny hops around the nest.

Then, on June 20—the day before Father's Day—we noticed something different. The mother and father birds spent the entire day perched nearby, chirping constantly as they hopped between our jasmine vine and the mango tree, almost as if they were encouraging their little ones.

The next morning, they were all gone.

The nest was empty.

For over forty days, our lives had quietly intertwined with the life of this little bird family. Seeing the empty nest was unexpectedly heartbreaking.

But we also knew what it meant.

The babies had found their wings. They were never meant to stay.

 We felt incredibly fortunate that these birds chose our home to raise their family at a time when ours had just grown smaller.

 Somehow, they reminded us that love doesn't end when someone leaves. We hold on to the memories, the laughter, and the time we were given, and we learn to let go with gratitude. Like those birds, every life follows its own season. There is a time to build, a time to nurture, and eventually, a time to fly.

This Father's Day, we are choosing to remember not the empty nest, but the beautiful season that came before it.

Happy Father's Day. ❤️

Books That Linger: Heart the Lover

I’ve been having trouble falling asleep lately, tossing and turning until I eventually reach for my phone and sink into another round of social media brain rot. Unsurprisingly, my eyes have paid the price. During the holidays, I decided to change that habit: I stocked my nightstand with books and moved my phone just far enough out of reach to make a difference.

The first book I picked up was Heart Lamp, the Booker Prize–winning short story collection by Banu Mushtaq. I managed to read only half the stories before I had to return it to the library, but it was exactly the genre I love, being a fly on the wall in other people’s everyday lives and absorbing their stories. It’s ironic how someone else’s mundane can feel like our own novelty. I hope to get my hands on it again soon and finish it.

Next came A Nearly Normal Family by M. T. Edvardsson. It is a crime thriller centered on the 18-year-old daughter of a pastor father and a lawyer mother. The premise was compelling in parts, though it grew predictable toward the end.

I then picked up Jeffrey Archer’s Sons of Fortune, purely out of nostalgia for a favorite childhood author. I was about halfway through when I stumbled upon Heart the Lover at the library. From the moment I picked it up over the weekend, I only put it down to sleep or drive.

Written in the future tense, something I’ve rarely read, it traces the journey of its female protagonist, Jordan, who will remind readers of their first love, their innocence, and their mistakes. One line in particular lodged itself in my heart: “If he knew how much I loved him, it would terrify him.” That thought comes from Jordan's recollection of Willie breaking up with her in sixth grade. When she asks why, he says, “Because you have all these memories of me stuffed inside you and I don’t, and it makes me feel funny.”

I keep pondering about relationships and conflicts. I believe there are two distinct kinds of relationships: those where imbalance is inherent—such as teacher and student, or mother and infant—where one gives far more than the other; and those built on equal partnership, like friendships, romantic relationships, and marriages. Conflict often arises when imbalance quietly seeps into relationships that are meant to be equal. 

I find myself returning to the two ways of seeing life that the characters debate. Would I choose presentism, believing life exists only in the immediacy of now, or the vast continuum—birth in a bang, expansion, collapse into a black hole, and rebirth in another bang?

Jordan’s journey made me think deeply, and even a day later, my heart still aches. I later looked up the book and found solace in the reviews, realizing I wasn’t the only one whose thoughts had been deeply stirred by it. I gathered that this is a companion to "Writers & Lovers" by the same author, guess I will soon be reading it!

NPR: https://www.npr.org/2025/11/03/nx-s1-5592934/heart-the-lover-lily-king-book-review

The Guardian: https://www.theguardian.com/books/2025/oct/30/heart-the-lover-by-lily-king-review-a-love-story-to-treasure

Books that Linger: Pride and Prejudice

December 16, 2025

So many Pride and Prejudice reels on my feed today! Apparently, it is its author, Jane Austen's 250th birth anniversary! There is no time like present to write about my obsession with Pride and Prejudice!

Though I did not step foot in any library until college and did not really have access to any books other than what we read for school, I always knew I enjoyed reading, learning about different people, circumstances, and their stories. The daily Telugu newspaper (https://eenadu.net) was my single thirst quenching resource in those days, a habit that got ingrained in me to this day. I used to feel all fancy on those occasional days I was able to borrow and read the MISHA and Soviet Union magazines from one of my cool friends that had the subscription. It was when I switched from Telugu to English as first language in my 11th grade that I had the first introduction to novels. An abridged version of Pride and Prejudice was on our curriculum that year and my antennae were in full reception mode, absorbing every thought, every character, and feeling every emotion. 

Every guy I liked was put next to me on a wedding altar instantaneously in my imagination, because you know, "A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment."

Every guy I liked that did not like me back was a Mr.Darcy telling me that I am "tolerable but not handsome enough...". 

I saw an Elizabeth Bennet in every girl that was able to say exactly what's on her mind even in the most challenging of scenarios. 

When watching Kareena Kapoor's Geet character unabashedly declare "मै अपनी फ़ेवरेट हू|" in the Hindi movie, Jab We Met, I could not help but remember Elizabeth Bennet declaring the same “I am the happiest creature in the world. Perhaps other people have said so before, but not one with such justice.”

I saw a Charlotte Lucas “In nine cases out of ten, a woman had better show more affection than she feels” in every well-meaning friend suggesting to compromise and feed to a man's ego.

I was fully convinced that I was great at initial judgment of men. (“It is particularly incumbent on those who never change their opinion, to be secure of judging properly at first.”)

And of course, there are those killer lines from Mr. Darcy-

“In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will no longer be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.”

I fully expected the man I was to marry to say those exact words like Mr. Darcy before I would even consider the marriage...but alas I did not have the patience and resolve of Ms. Elizabeth Bennet (“If a woman is partial to a man, and does not endeavour to conceal it, he must find it out.") and ended up proposing to my man first! 

There is something I did learn from Elizabeth Bennet and her creator, Jane Austen- to continue to be fearless and rise above every challenge life throws at me. 

"There is a stubbornness about me that never can bear to be frightened at the will of others. My courage always rises at every attempt to intimidate me.” - Elizabeth Bennet

Jane Austen may have never married or had a serious relationship in real life, but her novel, Pride and Prejudice, is a timeless manifestation of a woman's deepest feelings and thoughts on marriage and relationships. I take pride in the fun fact that I got married to my husband on the same day as Jane Austen's birthday!

Adi ParaSakthi- Dance Drama!!

I am impatient.
I have two left feet.
I’m not particularly religious.
I absolutely dislike sci-fi, anime, or anything remotely unrealistic.

Yet this past weekend, I sat through a five-hour dance drama on the nine forms of Goddess Shakti—and I could have watched more.

Such was the talent, finesse, and thoughtfully curated storytelling delivered on Saturday, November 15th at Lake Oswego High School by the 70+ member Surya Teja Arts team.

From Shailaputri, the mountain-born maiden, to Brahmacharini the ascetic, Chandraghanta with her crescent moon, Kushmanda who births the universe, Skandamata the divine mother, Katyayani the pious daughter, Kalaratri the fierce destroyer of evil, Mahagauri the serene form nearing awakening, and Siddhidhatri—the enlightened one who culminates as Mahadurga—the production brought each form alive with energy and reverence.

I had never known, until this performance, that the Goddess is called Durga because she vanquished Durgamasura. The story of demons seeking near-immortality and the Goddess outwitting them each time—with redemption and forgiveness woven in—felt as gripping as any modern thriller. Drama, romance, action, anticipation, even sci-fi-like visual effects—this production had everything.

The costumes, makeup, and stagecraft were exceptional. But the moment that stayed with me was the dance between the raging Kalaratri and her counterpart, Nataraja, trying to calm her. Andela Ravamidi Padamulada, an untouchable classic from Swarna Kamalam, was elevated even further by director Balu garu’s vision. The placement of the Goddess’ moment of self-realization within the song was sheer brilliance. When Kalaratri accidentally strikes Nataraja with her foot, the entire auditorium held its breath. The young dancers’ choreography was nothing short of astounding.

Only when my seven-year-old whispered that the performers had played bride and groom in the Tirumala Annamayya show back in May did I snap out of the trance. Until then, all I saw was the majestic union of Shiva and Shakti—the cosmic balance urging us to seek the divine in everyone and everything.

Take a bow, Director Balu garu, Surya Teja Arts, and SMVA Trust.
You transformed your audience for the better.

 

Humans (Angels) of My Life- The Doctors!

Humans (Angels) of My Life- The Doctors!

It's been exactly a year since my craniotomy surgery and looking back at this day last year makes me feel like I really have been born again.

The updates Bhaskar sent to keep our local friends informed during my hospital stay are in this blog post here:

https://tumorsandtravels.blogspot.com/.../hospital...

I also feel that I have aged a decade just this past year. I am still struggling with constant headaches, eye aches, and lack of energy, most of which get unnoticed because they don't come with visible bruises.

An army of people have been there for me through this surgery and recovery. With all the positivity that surrounds me, I am hopeful that I will recover soon from all that continues to ail me. I just wanted to take this opportunity to thank the amazing doctors that have made this surgery and recovery possible.

*****************************

Without further ado, next on my series - Humans of my life- are the angels that showed up in my life just at the right time, disguised as doctors.

First, it was the team of ER doctors at St. Vincent's on Feb 16th, 2024. Dr. E and his two other colleagues made some strategic decisions that literally saved my life. They ordered a CT scan even though my symptoms aligned with a normal migraine. The MRI they originally suggested to be done at my convenience was later ordered while I was still in ER. If it weren't for their abundance of caution, my tumor wouldn't have been diagnosed in a timely manner. Knowing my resistance for any doctors visits or medical procedures, that MRI would have been indefinitely put off.

I sat with that initial diagnosis for more than a week before I could see a neurosurgeon. I didn't share the tumor news with my parents or extended family/friends, and I was very anxious about what that all meant. Then came Dr. R, through my storytelling circles, who introduced me to his neurosurgeon-friend, Dr. M. It was Dr. M that gave me the much-needed initial prognosis, the options and choices ahead of me, and most importantly the confidence that I will most likely be alright.

Then it was Dr. H. whom I only saw that day for the first time because my regular ophthalmologist was unavailable. Towards the end of my checkup, I casually mentioned my meningioma and the need for a surgery. She stopped typing up my prescription immediately, swiveled in her chair towards me and said- "you HAVE to see Dr. G". She showed the scars from her own brain surgery from five years ago and said Dr. G was the best of the lot.

A quick google search for Dr. G told me he was related to a dear friend. She was able to make an introduction, and, by that weekend, I had moved to Dr. G's care. Everywhere I went to, from MRI technicians to the administrative personnel, I heard lavish praises of Dr. G. Even the nurse who shaved parts of my head the night before surgery said Dr. G was the best. Though it all seemed comical and staged at one point, it filled me with immense respect and trust for Dr. G. I had visions of him dressed as Lord Rama, holding my hand and walking me to the other end of a busy road. One might argue that my visions were the effect of the 'good stuff' I was getting as part of pain medication,

Then there is the chair of radiation oncology at UW, Dr. RR, yet another connection that just literally knocked on my door exactly when I needed, via an Intel friend that I met with for the first time in months. Dr.RR patiently educated me on the pros and cons of going for traditional radiation as opposed to Proton Therapy and helped me make an informed decision.

Finally, radiation oncologist Dr. L, and her team of radiation technicians at Fred Hutch that made the 8 weeks of radiation treatment, away from home and family, seem bearable.

These angels, disguised as doctors, are the reason I was able to get through this past year. I will forever be indebted to every one of them.

I have one more individual to mention here - the unleashed dog that chased me this afternoon on NW Madrone street, twice. I have serious childhood trauma from dogs pouncing onto me and biting me, and I am still quite shaken by the whole incident. I am thankful that this dog did not undo the collective work of all my doctor angels, on the very day I got another lease on life only a year ago, though he nearly did just that.

04.30.24 Getting wheeled into surgrey

Ian at Fred Hutch Proton Center

Front desk ladies at Fred Hutch Proton Center

Dr. G the neurosurgeon, G for God!

Dr. H, the ophthalmologist

The dog that chased me twice, on 04.30.25

Humans of My Life- Malayavasini Aunty

Next on the "Humans of my life" series- Malayavasini Aunty!

You all might remember how I announced my first Telugu publication recently, shouted from every social media rooftop possible, in fact, :). There is a discussion of my story on a popular online platform called Vedika, this weekend, and I am unabashedly sharing info about that too. But this post is not about me or about my first publication.

It is about someone that has the following stats:

20+ Books

200+ Published essays

180+ AkaaSa vaaNi Radio speeches

30+ Awards

29 M.Phil. and 31 Ph.D. graduates 

Countless accolades

I have had the pleasure of knowing the retired Telugu department head at Andhra University, Acharya Kolavennu Malayavasini garu, for almost two decades. It is fortuitous that her younger son, Panini, and I were in the same research group in grad school, and now work for the same company in Portland. So, during their visits here, I have gotten to experience the amazing command she has over Telugu language. 

Despite this close association with her, I only came to know of her brilliance and the full suite of her accomplishments this past weekend, when she was awarded 'Sriramanavami Pratibha Puraskaram' at a felicitation ceremony hosted by Sanatana Dharma Charitable Trust in Hyderabad on April 5th, 2025.

Malayavasini aunty is one of the most humble and down to earth humans I have ever known. She has been one of my mentors whenever I dabbled with Telugu writing. She was the one to suggest the title for the song I wrote for Raaga's dance last summer. She authored nearly 500 of her own original writings, and yet, enthusiastically celebrated my first publication, showered me with her blessings, and made me feel as if I was on top of the world. 

Students at Portland Manabadi were fortunate to have her and her husband, Sri Kolavennu Vithal Murthy garu, as the chief guests for our first ever Snatakotsavam in the summer of 2019.

I just wanted to take this opportunity and congratulate aunty on this latest feather to her already crowed cap! My sincere gratitude to aunty for inspiring the younger generations, with not just her unsatiable thirst for knowledge, but also with how she conducts life! 

Mother: Mrs. Andra Chintamani garu, Telugu language enthusiast

Father: Mr. Andra Seshagirirao garu, Renowned writer and Editor

Education: 

BA (Hons): First Rank in Andhra ViSwa Kalaparishat

MA: Second Rank and Gold medal

Ph.D. Topic: Andhra Vaangmayam-Ramayanam

Post Dctoral research from Gujarat University

Occupation:

Started as a lecturer at Maris Stella Women's college in 1965

Advised Over 29 M.Phil, 31 Ph.D. students over four decades

Positions Held:

Andhra University Head of Telugu Department 

Andhra University Board of Studies Director

Andhra University Dean of Oriental Learning

Brahmi Editor

Visakha Sahiti Editor

Andhra Bhasha Samiti- President

Bharatiya SikshaNa Mandali Mahila Vibhagam- President

Visakha Sahiti - President

Board of studies member at:

Osmania Univ

Kakatiya Univ

Banaras Hindu Univ

Sambhalpur Univ

Sri Padmavati Univ

Writings on Ramayanam:

Andhra Janapada sahityam-Ramayanam

Andhra Vangmayamu-Ramayanamu

Vividha bharatiya bhaashalalO Ramayanamu

Ramayana gaathalu- andulO mahiLalu

Molla Ramayanam vyakhyanam

Contributions to TTD: 

Andhra Mahabharatam- virataparvam

Andhra Mahabhagavatam- daSamaskandam uttara bhaagampai vyakhyanam

annamayya aadhyaatmika kIrtanalapai vyakhyanam (rendu samputalu)

Awards and Recognitions:

AP Govt Best teacher award

Nellore- Kavitraya puraskaram

Delhi Telugu Academy Puraskaram

Adhikara bhasha sangham puraskaram

Tanuku- Nannaya Bhattaraka PeeTha Puraskaram

Bangalore- Sri Krishnadevaraya Sahiti Puraskaram

Gopavaram- Molla Sahiti puraskaram

1990-Andhra viswakala parishat- uttama parisodhaka puraskaram

1980, 2000, 2004- US visits to spread the significance of Telugu language

And many more!

Leela: Hummingbird #4027

 Leela: Hummingbird # 4027

I first saw Leela, a gorgeous little baby hummingbird, with luscious yellows and greens all over her body, near Taara's daycare, one crisp November morning. A nice lady attending to her told me that she saw her flying right into the large glass window and falling down. I quickly moved on, trying to get my day going. As I walked back after dropping Taara off, however, I found her lying on the ground, alone, and I could not help but get a closer look. She was not dead! There was movement, though very faint, and she certainly was in a bad shape. 

I took a picture of her, shared it in my family's whatsapp group, and reluctantly headed to my car to get to work, mentally justifying my abandoning the poor bird with my impending work meeting but failing to convince even myself with that excuse. Just then, my phone chimed. "If she is still moving, you should do something about it"- opined my teen. That was the push I needed. I got off the car, ran back to the daycare and procured an empty box and some paper towels. "You know they don't usually survive after an injury like that, we tried a few times but they always died" - the daycare admin wasn't as optmistic as I was.

 As I was transferring the birdie into the box, I heard her make some of the most beautiful and innocent humming sounds I have heard in my life! I felt as if she was talking to me! I put her on the narrow space between the driver's seat and the back seat and drove the 6 miles to the Audobon society (recently renamed Bird Alliance) as quickly but smoothly as possible. She didn't make a sound during the drive and I began to worry. I instinctively sang laali laali, the lullaby I sang to both my children when they were babies- I still do on some of the rough nights. If nothing else, singing that song calmed my own nerves. That's when I decided to give her the name Leela, the palindrome of Laali. It immediately made me content, it felt like the right thing to do to call her Leela. I kept assuring her that she will be ok.

When I reached the venue, I found Leela not moving. My heart sank. I went inside the rescue center anyway, with Leela inside the empty box that once had granola bars. I filled the form as quickly as possible, and rang the bell, teary eyed. Took another video of Leela, sent to family group- "Leela is not moving :(". The vet came and asked me some questions, and took Leela in. He said I could wait while they triaged her. 

The next five minutes felt like an eternity. I tried to think about the what-ifs. What if I brought her there 5min sooner instead of wasting time contemplating? What if I left her there instead of picking her up and inadvertently injuring and/or shocking her more? I found it unfathomable that the sweet little humming I heard mere minutes ago would be her last. 

The vet opened the door and told me that Leela had just taken a nice flight around the clinic! Leela survived! I couldn't believe my ears! I was ecstatic! I think I might have hugged the vet! I sheepishly asked if I could get a video of her. My request was declined, these devices apparently scare the already shocked little birdies. They promised to send me an update in a week's time.

That moment was the highlight of my week. Both my girls were excited to see all of Leela's pictures and videos I took. My little one shared stories of Leela's rescue with all her friends at daycare. I too sent a message to the admin and she was genuinely happy to hear of Leela's success story. Through various Thanksgiving gatherings, family outings and dinner table conversations, Leela made for the happiest of my thoughts. I truly wish that's where my story of Leela ended.

Yesterday, while I was eating lunch with my girls, I heard my phone alert. It was an email from the Bird Alliance folks. Leela died on that Monday night. I am heartbroken eversince. My eyes well up as I type this. 

"At least she experienced all that love and warmth from you and the vet on her last day"- my teen attempted to comfort me. From the fall to the rescue, from being motionless to taking a happy flight, from a beautiful song to eternal silence, what a roller coaster it has been! Such is life!